Why I Don’t Regret My Ridiculous Tattoo

I always said I’d never get a tattoo. I felt like there was nothing I liked enough to honor with a permanent tribute on my body—not even cheese. (I prefer to honor cheese by eating it.)

Until the day I got a tattoo and it all made perfect sense to me.

The Tattoo’s Humble Beginnings

For Halloween 2005, I dressed up like pregnant Britney Spears (Cheetos, Kabbalah bracelet, and all) and my best friend Jillian dressed like a pregnant middle schooler.  Britney is about as smart as a middle schooler, so it’s sort of like we had the same costume.

Pregnant Britney SpearsHowever, while I drew on a fake dice tattoo (remember when Brit and K-Fed had matching tattoos? So fetch.) Jillian opted for a fake Chinese symbol that she decided would stand for “I do what I want.” She wanted it to be on the back of her neck, so I had the important job of making up the tattoo and drawing it on her. I know we took a picture of it, but I cannot for the life of me find it. Please just trust me when I tell you it was a work of art.

The Tattoo Makes Its Permanent Mark 

After Halloween was over, we kept talking about how boss that fake tattoo was. I wish I could remember the exact conversation and how we went from laughing about a funny tattoo to making the decision to have it permanently drawn on our bodies, but it seems like my early onset Alzheimer’s is kicking in right now.

I do remember that we rationalized it this way: We will always like to laugh and “I do what I want” will always be our motto for life. We knew that wasn’t going to change.

We ended up at the local tattoo parlor, picture of the fake Chinese symbol in-hand, and through our chuckles, encouraged the artist to make the tattoos as small as humanly possible. The purpose in getting the tattoos was to make ourselves laugh, but we didn’t actually want people to think we were lame and got real Chinese symbols tattooed on ourselves (sorry to all peeps with Chinese symbols tattoos, but come on). I hid my tattoo low on the left side of my back and Jillian hid her’s scary close to her lady parts.

After we got our tattoos, our friend Mellissa also got the same tattoo on the back on her neck because, duh, she is cool and also does what she wants. WE STARTED A REVOLUTION. (K, not really.)


This coming November 18th will mark the 10th anniversary of the “I do what I want” tattoo and I must say it’s one of the smarter things I’ve ever done in my life. It’s so hidden that I forget it’s even there 99% of the time, but the 1% of the time I remember is LOL central. I love knowing that even though my friends and I are all mad old now and have 5,000 kids, we still have this ridiculous tattoo that binds us together and reminds us to laugh and do what we want.

Personally, I think everyone should get this tattoo. If you want one, leave a comment or message me on Facebook and I will send you a picture to bring to the tattoo parlor. NOT KIDDING. I DO WHAT I WANT.

2 thoughts on “Why I Don’t Regret My Ridiculous Tattoo

  1. Pingback: mArY*s ZoNe Is 1 Year Old! | mArY*s ZoNe

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